Mentoring Guidelines: What Is an Effective Mentoring Arrangement?

In dealing with the structure, both the mentor and mentee are answering the question, “How do I/we establish and sustain a working relationship beneficial to both of us?”

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Of importance here are “pre-during-after sections” of the mentoring arrangement

Pre = focus: establish, embed

During = focus: expand, equip

After = focus: exit, embody

As you read the two lists that follow, which actions are “pre-during-after” in organizing your mentoring arrangement? Currently the action statements are listed in alphabetically ascending order.

From Mentee perspective:

The mentee usually approaches the mentor and requests the relationship (unless the mentee and mentor are involved in an Organizational Mentoring Program).

Therefore, the mentee will

1. ask for what she/he wants and needs
2. choose someone she/he respects and views as having success in her/his chosen career path (or similar one)
3. choose someone who embodies the professional characteristics worth achieving
4. close the arrangement when time arrives with explanation
5. consider someone who challenges you, stretches you
6. decide how to approach the chosen mentor
7. define roles in the relationship like time keeping, documentation, etc.
8. ensure clarity on the details of the arrangement – review and revise as you move forward together
9. follow-up, appreciate, follow-up, appreciate, etc.
10. listen responsively, clarify points as they arise or later after reflection
11. reflect on the fact “you do not know what you do not know – therefore, use questions to explore and discover”
12. remain open to adoption of new behaviors
13. set an intentional agenda
14. take action – based on learning – at the discretion of the mentee
15. consider involvement of more than one mentor at a time

Mentor Perspective:

The mentor will contribute in the following ways. He/she will:

1. agree on a meeting schedule
2. agree to mentor
3. ascertain the financial commitment required re: travel, technology use, phone costs, etc. and assign responsibility
4. ask questions that guide mentee to her/his best answer – now the mentee has a decision making framework for later use
5. assign time to the relationship
6. decide on the level of formality
7. demonstrate effective and relevant communication verbally and non-verbally
8. demonstrate emotional intelligence via awareness of his/her personal emotions and is sensitive to the emotions and feelings of the mentee
9. ensure that when he/she does not know the answer, he/she will pause and decide how best to find the answer
10. explore to contract or not to contract
11. get to know the mentee personally – education, current experience, aspirations, etc.
12. identify intention of the arrangement near the beginning = mentee goals
13. introduce mentee to his/her network of opportunities = sponsorship
14. leave decisions re: action with the mentee
15. listen than share (when you listen you learn, when you share you educate)
16. remain alert to the arrangement should it move away from the agreement – then, review and revise to move forward
17. share knowledge and skill

Did you re-sort the two lists according to pre-during-after designations? In doing so you create a 2-column times multiple-row matrix that serves as a mutual checklist to keep the mentoring arrangement within your agreed upon guide-rails.

In Closing

As you continue to learn from your mentors and mentees, and the organizations that support mentoring, realize how you are establishing and sustaining your mentoring arrangement. As you come across new insights, update these lists for your benefit.

About the author

Also, please upload your additions on http://www.gomentr.com. Use the search term “mentoring arrangement” as a keyword in your posting. Explore what others are posting as well as revisions to this document using the same search term.

In addition, if you seek clarification on one or more of the mentoring arrangement insights identified above, please correspond with Dr. Stephen Hobbs, Chief Mentoring Officer on GOmentr. Join his network to extend the conversation.